Please say yes.

 
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Please say yes.

It’s a three-letter word that could change your life. Trust me.

A few years ago I did something I never do. I made a New Year's resolution. Why don't I make them? Because how many people have you met that actually, faithfully, keep them? Exactly. 

Anyways, this particular year was different. Instead of vowing to lose weight, or take a picture every day, or read a book a week, I was convicted to do something that A) I knew I could actually do, and B) was practical. That thing? 

I vowed to say "yes" more. 

See, at the time I had found myself becoming a "no" man. My wife would ask me, spur of the moment, if I wanted to go somewhere.

"No, let's just stay in." 

My friends would ask if we wanted to do a game night. 

"Let's take a raincheck." 

My church would be hosting an event.

"It's been a long week / weekend." 

There was always an excuse. Always a reason. Always a defense. But you know what I realized? The more I said "no," the more it became a habit. And the more it became a habit the more isolated, sad, and selfish I became. My life became more about me and what I wanted, and less about those around me. I became engrossed in my feelings, my needs, my desires, and I was ignoring whatever, and whoever, was around me.

Like most things in married life, my wife pointed it out to me. I didn't like to hear it, but I knew it was true. I prayed about it, but I didn't really have to. She was right. So around New Year's I decided to make a resolution: I was going to say "yes.” Not to everything. Maybe not even to most things. But I was going to make a concerted effort to, if there wasn't a legitimate excuse, say "yes" to more things. Yes to the dinners, to the spontaneous park trips with the kids, to the events that mattered. Instead of saying no to five, I'd say yes to two. 

And you know what? Something incredible started happening. I found myself more pleasant. More joyful. More fulfilled. I found more purpose, especially as some of those things I started saying "yes" to involved serving others. At times, and I know this may sound weird, but it felt like I was part of something bigger, something greater. 

In December of 2018, nearly a year into my "yes" experiment, is when I saw the Facebook post from my dad asking for someone, anyone, to get tested to be a kidney donor for his friend. When I saw it, I didn't think much about it. Not in the sense that I didn't give it much attention, but in the sense that I had gotten so used to saying "yes" that I almost knew exactly what I was going to say before I said it. So I agreed to do it. I said, “yes.”

And here we are today. Maybe you're getting this email for the first time because you heard that next month I'm donating a kidney to a stranger. If so, first of all welcome. But also know this: My desire to say "yes" more is not just something I could muster on my own. The revelations and realizations that brought me to that point aren't the result of just being able to dig deeper and be better. No, I tried that before. And every time I gave up. 

Instead, the only reason I was able to start saying "yes" more is because I surrendered myself to the idea that there is someone greater than myself who is writing my story, your story, our story. And the more I ran away from that, the more I tried to say "no" to it, the more isolated, alone, and selfish I became. 

Is it any surprise, then, that I started feeling so different the more I said, "yes"? No. It's because once I started making a conscious effort to place myself in the hands of the one who held my story, I started feeling more a part of it. Go figure.

I said "yes" to my dad's Facebook post in December of 2018. It's September of 2020, and I can't tell you how mind-blowing it is to see how God has used that three-word response. It's led to a mini movement of sorts. My dad's friend didn't need my donation, so that gave way to a different recipient, one whom I have never met — a man named Ken who I became a perfect match for. A week ago we started a fundraiser to make his transplant a reality. Within three days we had nearly half of the $5,000 in expenses covered. By Wednesday, I was doing a national radio interview about it, with host Glenn Beck donating $2,500 of his own money. By Thursday, we surpassed $10,000, with the excess going to help others in need. By Friday, I had fielded calls from two TV stations who want to sit down and cover the story.

I'm blown away. I'm not sure exactly what I thought was going to happen, but what's happened has exceeded my expectations of whatever I thought should be happening. All because I said, "yes."

But my point today is not to sing my praises. Please, no. Rather, it's to point you to the only one who could orchestrate something like this. And to challenge you to see what he might do with you if only you start saying "yes" more often.

I remember being at a job where morale started deteriorating. Almost everyone was unhappy. No one trusted each other. It was dark. There was an accusation being thrown around about some of the lieutenants in the company. It was an accusation that at the time I vowed to never embody: "They're just a bunch of 'yes' men." 

Today I hope one day it's said of me that I was a "yes man." It's just who I'm saying "yes" to that makes all the difference.

Care to join me?

***

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